Restless

My restlessness got the better of me this evening and I finally gave in and took a walk. It was about 8:30 when I left, so it was dark and cold outside, which was exactly the way that I wanted it. I am guessing that it was about 15 degrees outside and the sky was clear with only a sliver of the moon, and a handful of the brighter constellations. The moment I stepped outside I could smell the strong scent of wood smoke on the crisp air which pleased me because it reminded me of Alaska, the place I love, though not as genuine. At home when I go outside on this kind of night there is pure silence. The world is cloaked in a heavy blanket of snow and its just me and eternity. The crunch of my own footsteps in the snow is all I can hear and it is then that I can feel most, the presence of a great and glorious being. Though I am a solitary person in the vast wilderness of Alaska I know that I am not alone. This is one of those moments that I enjoy experiencing over and over again. I typically prefer warmer weather but I do enjoy the cold at these times; when the air nips at your cheeks and the cold creates a feeling of refreshment and energy. Because I am not in Alaska right now I didn’t quite get the full effect of the serenity that I was seeking. There were buildings all around me, the headlights of vehicles staring me down, and people coming and going, causing silence to retreat.
During the course of my walk I wanted the chance to think, ponder, and contemplate. It was one of those moments where the core of me wanted enlightenment but I did not know how to seek it, or for what I was searching. My mind seemed to veer away from any deep thought but I was still able to enjoy a peaceful walk in the night. I was able to refresh myself physically and ease my restlessness to an extent, though I still feel a drive to discover.

Obituaries - A Little Early

The semester is quickly coming to a close for which I am very glad and excited. It has been busy the last few weeks, hence the lack of new posts on my blog. For one of my classes I was given an assignment where I was required to write my own obituary and have someone else write one for me too. I had my sister write the second one and I must say she did an excellent job. My Mom even suggested that I save it and use it (with a few minor changes). It was very entertaining to compare the two. I actually found the process quite interesting, and decided to post the results.

Disclaimer: Any names, dates, or places used in the following writing is not based on any real person or event and is purely coincidental.

Obituaries
Monday 17, 2075

We regret to announce the death of Marie Zimpalentikala. She died early Sunday morning after a long battle with bone cancer. Her husband Korben Zimpalentikala preceded her in death in 2072, and they are both outlived by their five sons, three daughters, forty-three grandchildren and six great grandchildren. Marie was first and foremost a mother and wife. She enjoyed raising her children and always teased her husband that they would never have a youngest child. She also had a great bond with each of her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren and always called each one on their birthdays, never forgetting one. Though she was 88 she had a very young and adventurous spirit. She was born and raised in rural Alaska and always had the great desire to return there though things never worked out in her favor. She willingly served in the community wherever she could and was known to everyone as a very caring and helpful person. She and her husband also served two missions for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, one mission taking place in Jackson County Missouri, and the other in Spokane Washington. They were preparing to serve another mission that was cancelled after the ailing health of her husband.
She graduated from BYU with a degree in Child Development and used her degree in the work field and at home as a mother. She met Korben during her schooling at BYU and they were married in 2013 and spent a long happy life together. Her family was all around her when she passed away at 4:37 on Sunday morning. The funeral will be held on Wednesday the 19th at 2:00 pm in the Cottage Hill Cemetery. In lieu of flowers donations can be given to the
American Cancer Society.

Marie Garren passed away of natural causes related to age on June 17, 2079. She was born on January 27, 1987. She grew up in Alaska with seven brothers and sisters. She obtained a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University in Child Development in 2012. After serving a year and a half mission in Viña del Mar, Chile, she married Kai Jaxson Garren in the Anchorage, Alaska temple on May 7, 2015. She was a wonderful wife and mother and had ten children of which three were adopted. She went on to obtain a masters degree at BYU in Child Psychology and was instrumental in helping thousands of children throughout her lifetime. She loved music and her family cannot remember a single day of her life when she was not singing. Music was an integral part of her methods when helping at-risk children. She was a faithful member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and served a second mission with her husband to Cordoba, Argentina in 2071. She is survived by nine of her children. She was proceeded in death by her husband and her daughter, Jayzen Diane. Her family will miss her sweet and caring spirit as will the many children she nurtured to her dying day. We love you Mom and we can’t wait to see you again in heaven.

Animals and Instinct...or not so much.

What makes each individual animal unique? I have often wondered this when I drive down the roads in Alaska and I see rabbits every few hundred feet moving in and out of the trees, or frozen on the edge of the road. They all look the same, and it is said that animals are driven completely by instinct, an innate sense of survival. Then where does the personality kick in? Animals each have their own spirit, they must have their own unique temperament. What makes one animal do one thing and another do a completely different thing?

We had a cat (technically my sisters, that you may have been introduced to on her blog) named Sahara, and during the years that she lived with us before she moved away with my sister, you could tell she definitely had her own personality. Sahara was very independent, which is pretty typical of most cats but she also had a defiant and mischievious personality. There were times when she would do something just to make us mad, or to get her way. One time when she was still pretty young my sister bought her a kitty collar. We began trying to get her used to it by putting it on her for an hour or so every day. Every time we would put it on she would attempt to get it off by pushing it off with her back legs, most of the time she would fail and just tolerate it, and if she did manage to get it off, someone would put it back on her. One day the collar went missing and when we couldnt find it we thought that we had misplaced it. It wasn't until a few days later that we found it. We found it shoved deep underneath one of the kitchen counters in a little tiny space caused by the overhang at the bottom of the face of one counter connecting to the side of another counter where the two counters met at the corner of the wall. It was pushed in very deep and we realized that Sahara had hidden it back there so that we would not be able to put it on her again.

It was also possible to recognize Sahara's moods. In the mornings usually around 6:00 am Sahara would decide that it was breakfast time. Sadly for us, we considered 6:00 to mean that it was at least two hours until it was time to wake up. When she would wake us up you could tell what mood she was in because she had different methods for each mood. If she was in a good mood waking up was always more pleasant, she would come cuddle up by your head, her purr going full throttle and lick your face until you were awake. On days when she was feeling a little more excited or energetic/mischievious she would run in and scratch the carpet or the bed skirt, which she knew was not allowed, and the moment you sat up in bed she would run out before you could catch her. And then there were her grumpy days. On these days she would come park right on your chest and take a paw and bat at your nose. If she was really grumpy or if you continued to ignore her summons for breakfast, you would begin to feel a slight brushing of her claws until you finally had to give in.

She definitely has a unique personality and if there are those that would say that this is all just a result of instinct then wouldnt it be fair to say that all humans survive completely on instinct also? Is that really all personality is? Is it just instinct that varies from person to person? So how far does it go in regards to rabbits and other wild and tame animals? Are animals personalities just not as broadly varied as peoples? Is their innate sense of survival so much more inbred that the personalities between each animal is much more similar?

If I were able to observe wild animals at length in the wild would I discover that a certain rabbit is more pessimistic than others? Maybe its not really survival of the fittest...maybe it is really survival of the most optimistic. Maybe the rabbit that gets caught by the lynx knew it was coming soon anyway so why waste all the energy running. Its now or later. What if it was a Dudley-Do-Right rabbit who took it for the team? "Go on, save yourself!"

As you can tell I really have little solid evidence, and no research to back up my views, but I am curious to know the answers to these questions all the same.

Attraction! - Male/Female Friendships

I have recently come up with a theory about the relationships between males and females. Not that I have much to base my theory on but a few observations. I know some girls who have a lot of guy friends. When I am at their house there are always different guys coming in and out to visit and hang out. All the girls are single and I began to wonder why, if they were such good friends with all these guys they don’t date any of them. This is when my theory began to form. I have decided that for girls and guys to be friends there has to be some reason that they don’t want to be in a more serious relationship. There has to be some form of attraction between them but for some reason it doesn’t work out. Either one person is attracted to the other but the other person does not return the attraction, or maybe there are circumstances that they both know it will not work out, or some other reason. But attraction is always involved. So then I tried to think of a way that guys and girls might be friends even if they are both unattracted to each other. I couldn’t really think of a scenario that would fit without some sort of attraction. I then asked another girl and her response was “Maybe they like their personality.” That is attraction! So in conclusion (as well as I can conclude) I think that there must be a form of attraction between guys and girls to be friends but also some reason that would cause the friendship to not form a more serious relationship.